10283.911 Nautical Miles Between Friends
Friends are a funny thing aren't they? wait bear with me, have a wee think about it. They are people who walk into your life and just click, people walk in and out of your life everyday but some people just click. Bizarre!
The thing is, they are people who walk in, care, listen, light you up a little and then leave footprints in their wake. Your friends are made up from all walks of life and you will find them everywhere, they're your chosen family. They're the first people you want to tell your news to, good, funny, bad and sad, they're the first people who spring to your mind when shits going down, I wouldn't want anyone else by my side in this silly situation other than my troublesome friends, we're each others sideline cheerleaders and I get all excited and proud of their accomplishments.
Friends, you just can't live without them.
They take work though, friendship isn't a one way thing, they take time, nurture and love. You need to check in with them, they might not know you're thinking about them.
One of the troubles of travel is maintaining friendships, it's very very hard, only the strongest of ones makes it through, people change, time goes by and life moves on and everyone tells me/you that's just life, but let's be honest it's shit. To have lots of friends and love around you, for you to then leave for 6 months, a year to travel or more, and return to it all being gone, your loving community you have nourished, laughed with and loved, moved on.
It's hard, it is.
It's life and that's how it seems to be, but it's bloody hard, and I won't have anyone tell me that it's just life, so get over it, because I'm sick of it. I love people, I look out for people and I make people laugh, and the most heartbreaking thing about it all is I will always love them and look out for them, even when they've moved on in their life. I've chosen a lifestyle where I'm neither here nor there, but I'm also that person who will bend over backwards to visit or check in with a friend or a loved one.
Stay close to people that feel like sunshine, because they're very hard to come by.
You won't notice this until you leave you, but it's tough, travel is a tricky thing, life gets hard and you need a break, but to leave, travel, and experience the extraordinary things that life has to offer, requires you to depart and disappear off the grid for a little while.
But this by no means, requires you to cut off all ties, loosing contact with loved ones, and absolutely does not mean you're no longer around.
Every-time I leave it's an emotional experience, I know full fact that when I return the people around me have moved on, FACT. But they're all upset because I'm leaving, they think I'm disappearing. It's a funny thing everyones cries, I'm not dying I'm just going away for a little while, you can still talk to me, tell me all the gossip and I will return some day with some of the funniest stories, I'm not dying. It feels like you've attended your own funeral it's dam weird. You guy's still have your community, but when I return i'll have to build my own again, so when you're reading this and you have friends that have moved, traveling, or just returned from a trip, drop them a message, give them call or whatever, because it's so much harder than you could ever comprehend. I'd go as far to say it's the hardest thing about travel.
And if you're reading this and thinking about travel, and the whole friendship debacle, keep in contact with them, don't cut your ties, let them know your still there, when you get homesick they're the people who are going make you feel warm inside, cheer you up and make you feel like you're home and give you the strength to get through shit. But for sure know this when you return, you will be left with the most genuine of friends, who will be there for you through thick and thin.
So just remember this, a smile goes a mile, but a message, or a call will create more quakes than you could every imagine. So just remember this when you're thinking about someone, they don't know you're thinking about them, I'm sure as hell, they'ed loved to know that you are. So go on, pick up your phone and make someones day.
I'm a member on a number of travel related Facebook pages, which is a beautiful community to be part of, lots of similar minded people, who are always there for you, if you have questions or thoughts. I posted about feeling homesick and asked for suggestions (I was wondering what there responses would be for a blog) this was their response which is ever so eye opening, in relation to how important friendships are for those who travel.
I posted in both 'Solo Female Vanlife' and Solo Women Travelers'.
I hope you find this humbling.
I'd just like to say there are way too many of you, so sorry if you don't feature in any of these I love you all.
For another one of my savvy reads which is relevant to this post 'Is traveling lonely?' it's about travel and whether it's considered a lonely game? I address the difference between loneliness and solitude in accordance to travel.
I wrote this post during the most loneliest point in my traveling history, I'd reached a point where I was traveling with someone and we were both deeply unhappy, it's strange how I felt more lonely with someone around than traveling on my own, it's incomprehensible, but now when people ask me it traveling alone lonely? I can say 100% no I enjoy the solitude.